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Jason's Blog

Bad Jason Jokes - Christmas Edition

Here's the bad jokes I wrote for Christmas! If you like these kind of jokes, feel free to use them over the holidays!!

Thanks for listening to the Wake Up Call!! Jason

What do you need to make red toast?
Ginger Bread

Why did Pimp Santa sadly only say Ho?
Because his two favorite hoe's quit.

What do you call a flying deer with a really high intellect?
A BrainDeer

How did the 3 year old, accidentally kill his snowman?
He tried to reach the snowman's face, but couldn't reach, and stabbed him in the stomach with the carrot.

How did Frosty's girlfriend kill him?
It's simple. She was hot.

What do get when you cross a Santa, potatoes, and a can?
Kris Pringle

How do you fix a snowman?
Remove it's snowballs.

What is a gr-foot made up of?
12 grinches.

Why can Santa's kick blow up your house?
Because he has a mistletoe.

Listen to Jason read these jokes to Gavin & Katie:
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WWE Interviews

With Wrestlemania coming up this Sunday, March 29, Jason got the opportunity to talk to some of the stars of the WWE! Listen to them below:








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Jason's Interview with Sgt. Slaughter

Jason got to interview one of his childhood heroes, WWE Legend Sgt. Slaughter.

WWE Hall of Famer Sgt. Slaughter came to 107.9 the End to help promote WWE WrestleMania Axxess, which takes takes place Thursday, March 26 through Sunday, March 29 at the San Jose Convention Center.

WrestleMania Axxess is an interactive fan festival where fans can meet the WWE Superstars, witness live in ring matches and view rare memorabilia. Tickets go on sale the morning of Saturday, January 31.

Tickets for the 2015 WWE Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony at SAP Center are currently on sale through Ticketmaster. The event takes place Saturday, March 28.
Listen to Jason interview with WWE legend Sgt. Slaughter:

  Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

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How a Bald Girl Helped Change My Life

If you're a regular listener of the Wake Up Call, you may have heard me talking about how I shaved my head because of something called “Alopecia Areata.” Katie and Gavin LOVE to make a big deal about the fact that I always say “Alopecia Areata,” instead of simply “Alopecia.” I never know what to say because the condition is “Alopecia Areata.” I think (rather, I know) they just like to laugh about how something so little, in their eyes, gets me all flustered.

Now, if this is the first you are hearing about my shaved head, you may be thinking “Jason, what's the big deal? A lot of guys shave their head.” So, what's the story? Am I a drama queen? Am I making a big deal out of nothing? Yes, and no.

Here's the backstory (if you care to read about it). In October 2012, after getting my hair cut, I noticed a bald spot that was about the size of my pinkie fingernail. I was 99.9% sure the girl cutting my hair had accidentally nicked my head with the electric razor. I mean, I noticed a small bald spot after a hair cut! It was in a random spot on the back/right side of my head. This wasn't a normal bald spot. It had to be the girl cutting my hair. Right??? Wrong.

Between October and December, the spot grew in size. By the middle of December, the once tiny spot, was now about 2 inches in diameter. While running my fingers through my hair, I started to notice a few more spots that were tiny, just like the original spot that I first noticed. I'd be lying if I said this didn't freak me out. It did. I set up an appointment with my doctor, who then quickly referred me to a dermatologist.

In late December, my patchy hair loss was diagnosed as Alopecia Areata. If you want more information on the disease, Google it. The gist of the condition is that it's an autoimmune disease where your body attacks your hair like it is a virus. That's it. It's not dangerous. It's not going to kill me. The only thing that's going to happen is that my hair is going to fall out in patches. With the exception of now being more vulnerable to bad sunburns on my head, and as a result being more susceptible to skin cancer on my head, it's almost purely cosmetic.

One side affect (if you can call it a side affect) that I've really been struggling with is the embarrassment of having patchy bald spots on my head. I always feel like people are staring at me. Shaving my head helps hide the bald spots, but if I don't shave every other day, the spots become much more noticeable. When the spots become noticeable, I'm always afraid that people are going to think I am contagious or that I am sick and dying. Again, I'm totally healthy. I just have a head which happens to look like its been gnawed on by a rat. (A big jerk of a rat who likes to eat my hair in patches!)

I feel horribly stupid admitting this, but there was actually a day in early January when I forgot to grab a hat before I left for work in the morning. I didn't realize that I forgot a hat until I got to work, but as soon as I realized my mistake, I started sweating. I was nervous that people would laugh at the way my head looked. It sucked. Thankfully both Katie and Gavin were only a text message away and both were kind enough to bring me a hat.

Over the past few months, I've started to get more comfortable living with Alopecia Areata. For the most part, I've stopped wearing hats. I figure that if people stare at my head, there is nothing I can do about it. If people want to ask me questions about the bald spots, which they can and have, I'm happy to tell them what I know about the condition and the treatments that I've been going through. (Shots in the head! The record for one treatment was 50 shots. Yes, it hurt.)

I wish I could say that ditching hats and dealing with my patchy bald spots was something that came from person strength, but I can't say that. Maybe I am short changing myself, but the truth is, my attitude started to change after watching a video on Youtube that was shot by a teenage girl who also has Alopecia Areata.

All I know about her is that her name is Jasmine, she has Alopecia Areata, and she has an AMAZINGLY POSITIVE ATTITUDE!!! Watch her video! It's amazing and inspiring!

Hell, I have it easy. I'm a married Dad. I'm losing my hair in patches and I shaved my head. Boo hoo. Poor me. I look like every other guy who has a shaved head.

Jasmine? She's a teenage girl who is bald! Yeah, she's a teenage girl. She is bald because of Alopecia Areata. She is dealing with it like a champ. Hell, I was uncomfortable when I was a teenage, and I had my hair.

Jasmine's video is titled “Reasons Why” she loves being bald. I highly recommend that everyone take 5 minutes out of their day to watch her video. It doesn't matter if you have Alopecia Areata and are bald, or if you have long, flowing hair down to your butt, Jasmine's video is inspiring, funny, and truly refreshing. If you aren't comfortable in your own skin, maybe her video will help you realize that having a positive attitude about yourself can go a long, long way to in helping you find true happiness.

Here is Jasmine's video:    

Email me with comments/thoughts/etc:  jason@endonline.com

Follow me, like me, chat with me Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram all under the name: @JasonWakeUpCall


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Finally, the Rock is coming back to Sac!!

WWE Smackdown is coming to Sleep Train Arena on Tuesday night, January 22nd, featuring the Sacramento return of The Rock!  

Most people know that I'm a lifelong fan of WWE and when they come to town I try to use my connections to get as many Wake Up Call and 107.9 the End listeners into the show for free. This show will be no different!!

Not only do we have tickets to give away, but if you enter to win, you'll also have a chance to sit in the FRONT ROW with me!!  Yeah, if you are the grand prize winner, when the Rock is in the ring at the show, you will be about 20 feet away from him.  If he walks by our seats, you'll be able to shake his hand!!  

Excited?  Interested?  Click this link to sign up.
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If you like burgers...read this blog!

Recently, at Facebook.com/JasonWakeUpCall, there was a discussion about burgers! I wrote a long comment and I have decided to post it to my blog as well. Feel free to comment and add in your own favorite burger places!! I've also included addresses for a few burger locations and links to all of the burger websites!! My thoughts on burgers: There are very few burger places that I dislike. In and Out is really good. To me? A room temperature double double animal style is AMAZING! I don't know why, but In and Out tastes best to me when it is on the warm to cool side. White Castle is my all time favorite fast food burger because I grew up with it in NJ. The frozen ones aren't close to the real, fresh ones. I'm a huge fan of the Habit. To me, the Habit is In and Out if there was such a thing as gourmet fast food! I mean, it's not gourmet, but it feels a bit snazzier than In and Out. No offense In and Out! I love you guys as well! Five guys rocks. If you haven't heard of Five Guys, you will. They started out on the East Coast and are now expanding to the West Coast with a location in Natomas. Eating at a Five Guys is great. Yes, the burgers are a bit greasy, but that won't kill you if you do it every once in a while. It's all about moderation! Recently, I've grown quite fond of Smash Burger. They are another chain that is starting to pop up here in Nor Cal. There is one on Sunrise in Citrus Heights. I think it's right past the Sunrise Mall going toward Madison. They are opening a new one in Roseville by BJ's. Um...what else. Squeeze Inn. Love it! I usually save Squeeze Inn for out of town guests. They always love to try to world famous Squeeze With Cheese! I heard a rumor that Guy Fieri said that the Squeeze Inn serves the best burger in America! Find the Squeeze Inn at 106 North Sunrise Avenue Ste. C1 in Roseville, CA, 1350 Harbor Blvd in West Sacramento, 5301 Power Inn Rd in Sacramento, or 545 Industrial Drive in Galt! In the "oddest name, but best burger" category, try a burger at Nationwide Freezer Meats. They are located at 1930 H Street in Sacramento. Nationwide is less about presentation and more about kick ass burger experience! What else...what else. I feel like I am missing some obvious ones. California Burger in Citrus Heights is on my regular loop of burger stops. Like most Americans, I grew up with McDonalds! I am quite fond of the Big Mac! You will NEVER hear me knock McDonalds! Ok....that's all I have at the moment! If I missed anything, and I'm sure that I did, please let me know!! Send me a friend request on Facebook for more about burgers and whatever else is going on in my mind!
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President Obama's Birth Certificate! (A Closer Look---by Jason)

After years of asking, the biggest issue facing the future of the United States of America has finally been addressed. President Barack HUSSEIN Obama and the White House officially released his original birth certificate. (CNN Story Here) We now have clear-cut proof that President Obama was born in the United States of a America. Whoa! Hit the breaks! Do we really have clear-cut proof that our President is truly qualified for the position he currently holds? Let's look closer at this newly released document. Authentic or not, (and I have my doubts) the basic look of this document should make every citizen of our fine country ask a few obvious questions. What kind of man is Barack HUSSEIN Obama? Let's start with the fact that I have doubts that Mr. Obama is a Mister, at all. Yes, his sex is listed as male, but "male" is nothing more than a word. Come on Barry! You know what words are!! Words are those combinations of letters that you are always reading off of your teleprompter! If Mr. Obama isn't hiding anything about his sex, why has he refused to release DNA testing that proves that his daughters are actually his biological children. There are other glaring issues that I've found with this "official" birth certificate. Look closely at the document. Do you notice anything obvious? I'll give you a hint. My United States Birth Certificate was printed on white paper with blue ink. Like Mr. Obama, this document is different, and not in a good way. This newly released document wasn't printed on red, white or blue paper. It was printed on green paper. It wasn't printed with red, white, or blue ink. It was printed with black ink. Let’s start with a puzzling fact about the black ink. A recent internet search (Thanks Al) for Kenya black ink pens sent me to the following link: http://ke.countrysearch.tradekey.com/black-ink-pens.htm Click the link. Read what it says. No, that's not a misprint. The web page clearly states that "currently, we don't have any suppliers from Kenya selling black ink pens". I'm not good with numbers, so I'll let you do the math on that one! Aside from the ink, as previously stated, Mr. Obama's birth certificate was printed on green paper. The liberal media won't tell you this, but yellow and blue make green. Yellow, as we all know, is the color of cowards. After some digging, I found that blue is the color FURTHEST to the LEFT on the French flag. Do you notice a pattern here? No? Of course you don’t Rachel Maddow. Now, some people may believe that this (supposedly) genuine, green document of birth" proves" once and for all, that our President, Barack HUSSEIN Obama, was born in the United States of America. To that, I say Hogwash and God Bless America. Jason (Sadly, I need to state that this is, in fact, a parody of the Birther movement. Minutes after posting this blog entry, somebody commented to me that I was as ignorant as the rest of the birthers, if not worse.)
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The 107.9 the End App....something new coming soon?

For months, iPhone users have enjoyed the new 107.9 the End App. If you aren't an iPhone user, but still have a smartphone, there is a really good chance that you are feeling left out. I feel your pain. I don't have an iPhone and I want to be a part of the buzz surrounding the new 107.9 the End App. So here is the thing. I over heard a conversation that I wasn't supposed to hear. Something new is coming for non-iPhone users. I can't say what it is, BUT....I can give you a HUGE hint. How? Well, that leads me to a video that I recently saw. Watch the video and you should be able to figure out what is coming soon.... Oh yeah, this is 100% legit...there are multiple videos online, but I only recently heard about Shockwave.
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What a dirtbag!!!! He almost struck again!!

Every Thursday morning, the Wake Up Call has a new Confession from a listener. This week, we talked to a married guy who claimed to have a fool proof method of cheating on his wife. He claimed that his methods were so awesome that his wife would never find out. While that may be true, he may not have realized one thing. The Wake Up Call is a popular radio show, and 107.9 the End is a powerful radio station! Check out this e-mail that I received on Friday morning: _________________________________________________________________ Hi Jason and the wake up call: This is a bit of a story but wanted to share it with you guys. I had posted a dating ad a few weeks ago for something casual and specifically asked for SINGLE men only. Of course I had to week through tons of responses and there was a good looking guy that fit what I was looking for. He gave me very specific days and times to work with, which I found a little frustrating but, we made plans for dinner anyway on one of the few nights he had free. Then, a few days prior to the dinner date, he cancelled. A week later he tried contacting me but I had already moved on. Then yesterday I got a text from him explaining to me that he had a family emergency which is what caused him to cancel on me but he still really wanted to meet. At that point I thought I would give him a chance. But he was still giving me these very specific dates and times so my gut was telling me he isn't single. So I asked him, straight up, are you single and he claimed he was. Then I heard the confession this morning from the Married man and his fool proof plan to cheat. This stirred up that gut feeling I had and so I texted the guy this morning asking if he lived alone. He said no. I asked if he had roomies and that's when he tells me - the family emergency he had was about his Mom under going emergency surgery and now he's moving in with her to take care of her... So of course the confession runs through my mind and I simply can't believe he's telling me this exact story I heard on the radio. I tell him about the story and then cancel the dinner because I just can't be sure at this point - that maybe he is telling the truth but I don't want to take the chance. He then offers up a chance to meet his Mom or see a pic of her arm...I call his bluff - or at least I assume it's a bluff - and say I would be inclined to meet her and see proof of his situation because too many married men try to say they're single. Instead he sends the pic of a Lady with a bandaged arm. It's her left arm and she's still using her right arm to type on the keyboard in front of her. So clearly it's not a 24/7 caregiver situation if she can get around with her right arm! He NEVER responded to my agreement to meet his Mom for proof. I wonder if it's the same guy! Anyway, thought I would share this coincidence and tell you that your confession segment might have just saved me from a terrible situation! M. (name has been protected to keep her identity secret) ______________________________________________________________________ Now, I can't confirm that this is the same guy from our Confession, but it sounds very, very similar. If it is the same, guy that would be GREAT!. Sure, his poor wife may not know what is going on, but his confession was shared with thousands and thousands of women in Northern California. It seems that the sharing of his story may be the cause for his downfall. Foolproof? Nope. Fool? Yes, he is.
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What was the mystery smell?

There was a disgusting smell in our kitchen. We couldn't find it for days! I thought it smelled like something died!!!! My wife was convinced that it was the sink drain. What was it? As it turned out, my wife had left the grease that she drained from making tacos, in a red solo cup, by the side of the sink. After a week, this is what the grease looked like. Yes, this was the mystery smell.
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